The Jackson Family Online

The mood at school today is a little more somber than usual. Maybe it’s the dreary day, we’re definitely getting our April showers…but I think even more so the budget cuts and coming laid off people issue weighs on people’s minds. You can’t help but notice all the areas that are being cut…just to make copies anymore which I hardly ever do…is tricky. We have to sign out paper in multiple locations like it’s gold. And things like turning off the computer at night are becoming a bigger deal. Some of these changes are easy…some are not. I’m not worried for myself…I know whatever happens I’ll be fine…but if anything I wonder whose lives are about to be pulled out from underneath of them and what will it do to their families. God works all things for good for those who love Him and are called according to His purposes…clearly not everyone at my school fits into that category by a long shot.

I’m thankful that I only have five more school days til spring break…definitely a break that I’m looking forward to, the family time, the going out of town for a couple of days, the relaxed pace is something I’m looking forward to. Tonight we have no big plans, and I must be getting older or something because that sounds like bliss to me. I’m still waiting for my first grass to start coming up…I’ll keep you posted I know you’re on pins and needles waiting too:). (I’m joking…in case you didnt’ realize it:).

Hope you’re having a great day! I was reading the promise section of a book that I have of Bible verses last night on patience…I ended up underlining just about every verse…Waiting is never really easy…but I have a sense that as I wait on God…he is not only accomplishing His purposes in my life but is also giving me the desires of my heart in His time…as long as I don’t pull a Hagar…I should be fine:). I read a blog last night about the whole Abraham, Sarah, Hagar situation…talk about a long wait…and in the end when they took matters in their own hands…talk about some serious consequences…I’m hopeful that in my life…maybe…I can hold out for God’s best at least in a few areas, we all make mistakes from time to time…but I hope that more and more I’m living God’s best for me…you too!

Love,

Ruth

Got an interesting email notice from our superintendent tonight…it appears that we are joining the rest of the school districts in the area and making cuts…not sure what that will involve but it seems evident that some jobs will be cut…their’s a meeting after school on Thursday so I should probably know more after that. I’m not really worried about it…seems to be the nature of our country at the moment. THe state of Illinois has made only one of it’s payments to our school district. We are required to provide certain services and programs which the state is supposed to fund…but since the state of Illinois is in such deep debt…their is not going to be anymore money coming to the school probably so…we’ll see what happens. I’ve been in this district for three years now…I’m not tenured…and I’m not sure how deep the cuts will go. I do have a very specific kind of job with it being music so that helps…but who knows…Actually, God knows…so that’s good enough for me.

Hope your job situation is what you need it to be,

Ruth

I feel like I can see the light at the end of the tunnel…six more school days til Spring Break!! It was also nice to pull out fresh music to work on in honor choir this morning. It’s funny how that works…you pull out a song, run over the parts over and over and over…try to add in some dynamics, diction, cut offs, etc. to finish it off and by the time it’s finally ready to perform…I’m generally at the point where I don’t ever want to do the song again…o.k. maybe that’s a bit strong of a statement but you get what I mean. The repetition of my job can get a little mind numbing, it is nice to see it all come together for the performance though and their is something about the live audience that adds the needed spark to make the song come to life that doesn’t occur in the practice room.

Yesterday I alluded to some thoughts from the morning…in Sunday School, we were talking about the book “Don’t Waste Your Life” by Don Piper…we were focusing on the verses in the bible that refer to a wasted life vs. the verses that tell us what our life should be about. And in the process of discussion it led to those people we know or have read about that have “lost” it all for the sake of Christ, missionaries, and various other people. And then what our lives look like in America for the most part and the huge span between those different lifestyles. In church Pastor Mark has been talking about the giants of our faith and each week we are again remembering the fact that the way they chose to life their life was hard, not easy…not comfortable etc. I mean Noah building a boat when it had never even rained…Abraham leaving family and friends behind permanently, Moses going back to Egypt when he was more than comfortable living in the desert, Joshua fighting literal giants, etc. And I found myself thinking…the only reason why they made the choices they made, and the only reason why missionaries have gone and died trying to spread the gospel…is because they had an encounter with God. I don’t think these people sat down, weighed out the pros and cons…made a chart, consulted a sample group, or spent any real length of time trying to make the decision. When these people came face to face with God, literally or figuratively…the decision was an easy one…I’ve had that experience in my own life on a small scale…when Mark and I moved from Michigan to Illinois…while that may have seemed hard for some looking on leaving every family member behind as well as many friends, for both Mark and I it was an easy decision…we knew God was in it and we had caught a glimpse of what God wanted for us to do. And I have no regrets about the decision we made. So…this whole line of thought begs the question…have we really encountered God, have we gotten a glimpse of who He is…do we understand that being a “giant” for God has nothing to do with us and everything to do with who He is. Sometimes we think we have all of these choices to consider, and I guess in a sense we do…but on the other hand…if we’ve encountered God, we’ve heard from HIm, we’ve experienced His call…then when the time comes to make a sacrifice, to move, to give, to love, to change occupation, whatever the decision might be I don’t really think it’s as hard as we might think. I would have to wonder…if the decision is so hard…do I really know who God is…am I really in a close relationship with HIm…etc. If I know God, If I’ve tasted and seen that the Lord is good, if I understand that He works everything for my good, if I believe in Heaven and that my name is written in the book of life, if I have experienced HIs grace, His power, His provision in my life, If I understand that God is faithful even when I’m faithless, If I know that God is completely trustworthy, and not a detail slips by Him, If I understand that He is my protector, my shield, my fortress, my stronghold, my rock, my anchor…and I could go on and on…If…then…when it comes time to step out for God…it’s not really all that hard, in fact I literally anticipate and look forward to stepping out for God. If I said that in Christian circles at church I think I would get a shocked look from everybody in the room like I’m a lunatic…So…am I a lunatic or is something missing in our churches…why is this such a foreign thought…I go to a wonderful church with wonderful GOd filled people…but how is it that our view of God can be so fuzzy, are we just so comfortable that we’ve never had to put any of these things to the test and discover for ourselves that they are true. It concerns me that we can repeat the right things about God when we pray, “Thank you God for your mercy, your love, your goodness, your holiness, on and on…” And yet…when it comes to real life application of those very qualities of God it seems like everything we worshiped and praised God for goes out the window. This is one of those soapbox issues for me if you can’t tell.

If you believe that God is good…believe it every minute no matter what your circumstance.

If you believe that God is Holy and calls you to a life of holiness…understand that your life will be set apart…it’s not going to look the same as anybody else’s life.

If you believe that GOd is faithful…then bank everything you have on HIm…what more reliable thing do we have?

If you believe that God is trustworthy, that every promise is true…and not a hair can fall from your head without Him knowing it…then rest

I could go on and on…

But the point is…this doesn’t sound like an uncomfortable, hard way of life to me at all…truthfully it sounds like peace, security, rest, joy, purpose, etc. Sounds like that whole verse about losing my life is really gaining it is completely true. I’m not one of those people that others are going to talk about someday and marvel at their sacrifice…at least as far as I know. I’m probably not going to go off to a remote tribe and be killed because I’m spreading the gospel…or at least that isn’t coming up on my radar screen at present…But I am a person who is banking everything I am on God who is everything to me. From that stand point I’m grateful for the experiences I’ve had in my life…at a fairly young age God lined it up for me to either go all the way…or walk away…and thankfully…I chose to go all the way. I think for many the issue is that they don’t want to go all the way and don’t want to walk away and seem to be perfectly comfortable walking along the fence posts of life. You all know what a crazy landscaper I am…the visual picture I get is…one yard has holes in it…no grass, kind of like my old yard used to be…then their’s the fence…on the other side is green pasture, by the river, with shade, flowers etc. Why would I want to choose to live in the messed up yard, and why would I want to try and balance on the fence posts of life…not me…I’m all about hanging out by the river, enjoying the shade, noticing the beautiful flowers…and I’ve learned through experience that life has nothing to do with what my human eyes see and everything to do with what I see when I look through God’s eyes. You know He’s living inside of you right? You have a choice…the choice is to see your world through His eyes or to keep seeing it through your own eyes. Any time when I’m getting down, discouraged, disillusioned I can guarantee you I’ve been seeing life through my own eyes. I hope those times are getting less and less and further apart all the time…until one day I will always see through His eyes.

Be a giant for God, go all the way, don’t worry about that “it’s a hard life, it’s uncomfortable life stuff” Encounter the living God…and I think you could build an ark if needed, you could go in front of a Pharoah if needed, you could fight the battle if called upon, you could give away more than most people would logically speaking, you could move, you could change occupation, you could care for people in your sphere of influence, you could sponser a child, you could go on a mission trip, you can do anything that GOd is calling you to do…but first we must encounter the living GOd…in a life changing way, not just know about GOd, not just talk about God…but have the rubber meet the road and have to come to a place where we bank everything we are, everything we have and ever will be on God…what do you think our life circumstances are all about…I think that’s the point of suffering, the point of loss, the point of struggle…it either draws you closer to God or pushes you away…

O.k. enough of my preaching for now:)…gotta run back to class:)

Ruth

It’s been a good Sunday, very full…but good:). This morning we woke up to a couple of inches of snow…not something we usually see by March 29th and Lydia’s first words about it were “this is depressing:)” Thankfully it fast melted away and actually was probably good for the grass I just planted over the weekend. This morning’s giant that was preached about was Elisha…one of the bible characters that is probably lesser known by my girls so I was glad for them to get more acquainted with His life. I had some thoughts both from my Sunday school class and church service today but I’m not going to get into them right now…save them for a later time.

After church we went out to lunch with Debbie Batton…was very nice and she is such an incredibly kind person, so gracious and patient with kids. A true gift. Then we came home for an hour and then drove over to Greenville to see Lisa Gines perform in the Greenville College group. The music was absolutely beautiful…I was in the choir at one time but it’s been many years ago and the quality of the music is amazing, the diction, the tone, the balance, the dynamics, everything and it’s all accapella. Awesome! Then we turned right around and went back to our church for a music program at 6pm which was called “The Witness” it was an acted out telling of the life of Jesus with quite a bit of music, two hours worth. The church was absolutely packed out and I think the audience for the most part seemed really into it. I think my girls and I were probably not as much simply because we had just been to a music concert and might have been a little “musiced” out…who knows. But all the same you could tell the people in the play had put a lot of time and effort into it and were trying to convey an important message from their hearts so that’s the main thing:).

ANyway…time to get ready to start another week. Feels good to have the music contest monkey off of my back. And no programs for the month of April…yeah!! One more week til my mom and sister come and until we get a few days off for spring break yippee!!

Hope your weekend was great!

Love,

Ruth

Another music contest has come and gone and my group got a first place so that’s good news. They could’ve gotten a first superior but didn’t…which is like getting an A+. So…they were a little disappointed as we tend to shoot for the stars…but as I thought about it on the way home on the bus, and as I read through the judge’s comments I realized that the thing I teach most and focus on the hardest has sunk in. My first goal is to teach my kids to be responsible, respectful people. And I have to tell you for a group of 40+ middle schoolers the fact that I didn’t have one moment of being embarrassed by their behavior, one moment when I had to get them quiet, one moment when they were inappropriate from start to finish, well that’s nothing less than miraculous…and truthfully…what matters more, the fact that their music was flawless, or that they know how to behave, how to show respect, how to listen…hands down the second area mentioned is the life long skill I’m meant to focus on…the music is there but it’s always secondary in my mind. I do need to figure out how to get an accompanist involved for our next competition…I’ve been playing and directing from the piano and the truth is…at this contest it became obvious that for us to get the finetuned performance we need to have to go from good to excellent they need a conductor in front of them…a little frustrating for me…last year when I assisted I always played for Mrs. Kramer and she directed. She never had to give it a thought and it makes a huge difference that I don’t have someone who has the piano skills to accompany my groups…Something I need to iron out. Still…all was good, it’s over…and now on this incredibly rainy day I’m going to take a nap.

I got my back yard done last night…45 lbs. of grass seed on my fresh dirt and this rain is perfect!! I shared this info with my choir kids and my own kids and they all looked at me like I was crazy:). Hey I appreciate the built in sprinkler…saved me a lot of work! Can’t wait to see the green grass coming up. Feels so good to have the backyard finished and almost ready to simply enjoy.

Tonight Lauren is going to a party at a friend’s house, otherwise we’re just hanging out at home…so good to have some time with no big plans! Hope your weekend is great!

Love,

Ruth

I keep forgetting to get milk…for the past week…every morning I suddenly realize that I again have forgotten to get milk…the pop tart thing has gotten a bit old so…this morning I caved and said…girls if we can get ready fast enough we’ll go through the McDonalds drive through on the way to honor choir…amazingly enough they got ready fast:). This is how tired I was though…I actually forgot to brush my teeth. You would think I wouldn’t admit that for all the world to see…but have you ever been so busy taking care of everybody else that you forget to take care of some basic needs for yourself…my forgetting to brush my teeth was simply an outward sign of my mental state. Last night after blogging…I went down to my bedroom which thankfully is far removed from my girls bedrooms and I just cried out to God for quite awhile. I can’t even tell you everything I was feeling…you wouldn’t need or want to know anyway…but let’s just say I went to bed last night with some really blood shot eyes. I was tempted to run up and email a friend, a relative to get it out…but knew in my heart that what I really needed was simply God…I needed a fresh word from Him, I needed Him to meet my need…and once I stopped communicating my stuff to God…and actually had some quiet time to listen I did hear from Him. I have to tell you…I told Him…”I know all of the normal promises that run through my brain at these kind of moments and while they’re great and normally do the trick to refocus me…last night I needed something fresh, some thought that I could clearly know wasn’t just me conjuring up my normal litany of bible promises I repeat to myself”. I have to tell you…as always God was faithful…he brought this thought/verse to my mind. I know it’s a verse in the Old Testament, can’t remember exactly where or if I’m wording it accurately…but this is what it was “Stand back (or maybe still), the Lord will fight the battle for you.” In 10 short little words God spoke to me exactly what I needed after me ranting, crying, and expressing my frustrations for an hour.

I tend to be a person who feels like she’s in a battle everyday. Maybe we all are…I don’t know if that’s how you feel or not. I’m fighting the good fight for my kids at school, fighting the good fight for my kids at home, my friends, family, church, neighbors etc. I’m in the battle, on the front lines, exactly where I told God He could place me…and occasionally I just can’t take it anymore. I just want to lay down and die. Last night one of my biggest cries to God was the reality that I don’t feel like I have anyone who takes care of me. That may sound incredibly selfish…but I give out an awful lot each day with little to no return most days. I don’t have anyone who has my back…at least not on a regular basis. Most of the time I think I operate alright and it’s not a big problem. Every once inawhile that reality just overwhelms me. I know God takes care of me…but knowing and feeling it are not the same thing. I don’t suggest operating on feelings alone and that’s not how I live but once inawhile you have to feel something…so…for God to say “stand back, and let the Lord fight the battle for you” was huge… I knew I was walking in to my worst elementary classes this morning…I knew I was walking into full choir today which means huge class sizes, I knew it was a Friday and everybody’s ready to be done for the week, I knew before I arrived that I have confrontations that need to happen with individual students, I know I need to confront one of my coworkers about something she did this week that disrespected me…all the kinds of stuff that I don’t relish or enjoy…I felt like getting up this morning and walking into school was literally going to be like walking into a battle. I was telling God I didn’t have the strength…so for Him to say “Stand back”…well that was huge. It took a huge load off of my shoulders. And for Him to acknowledge that He understands I need someone to take care of me…that He would fight the battle for me was exactly what I needed.

I was grateful to hear from God…and I have to tell you over half way through my day already…I’ve calmly stood back…and watched Him fight the battle…my classes have been fairly calm, I feel at peace, and the day is fast going by…He gave me an idea for my choir classes today that I know I would’ve never thought of without Him and it’s working out great. And once again I am reminded that even when I’m faithless GOd is still faithful.

Sometimes on this blog…maybe it seems like I share too much, I don’t know…or maybe sometimes it seems like I’m down, and truthfully maybe you don’t want to be brought down with me…I understand. At the same time I share with you the downs simply because when I’m down…those tend to be the greatest moments of God speaking clearly to me, God demonstrating His faithfulness to me, God providing…and if I make that public…then who knows…maybe it will encourage you if you’re down today. O.k. I don’t pray real specifically for certain circumstances to happen…I just don’t believe that’s how I should pray…but I do believe that God can take us when we are stripped down and raw and hear our heart’s cry and hold us til we’re all cried out…and be able to handle every emotion coming out, even if it isn’t the best…and comfort us. I guess that’s what I needed last night…I needed to get it all out and then I needed to feel the strong arms of God holding me and even when I wanted to push Him away He hung on and wouldn’t let me go…until I finally fell limp against Him and soaked in His embrace. I’ve done that with my own kids before…when they’re angry, confused, hurt…sometimes we need to be held even when we don’t realize it or necessarily want it…just so we can tangibly feel love. God did that for me last night. And today…I feel at peace…I am going to go brush my teeth though:).

Love,

Ruth

O.k. on one hand it was really nice to have the day off. And I’m thankful I had it…I was able to catch a few zzz’s this morning before the dirt arrived. I was also able to do a quick run through my house cleaning which was good as I’m working on Saturday, I was able to put 50 bags of dirt down in my backyard and then got two teenagers to finish the rest after school…In total I’ve put down 8,600 lbs of dirt today…it looks good and is ready to plant grass in, for that I’m grateful. Today I realized that my hot water heater wasn’t working…went to wash dishes and wala…no hot water…it’s an old water heater so I figured I would have to replace it…thankfully God helped me to think of calling Mark Schaefer and he came over and checked it out at the same time I had the teenagers working in my yard and he figured out it was just the pilot light…after all of the strong winds we’ve had I guess that could effect it, thankfully…that problem is fixed and in the process of Mark coming over he was able to talk to the boys in my backyard and that was a divine appointment, I think one of them will be in church on Sunday because of the contact…so it made the whole thing seem like it was worthwhile.

Tonight Lydia had an orchestra concert which was fairly long…Elementary all the way through High school…good but you know how it goes…I was proud of Lydia for being involved.

I already got my first report from school today from the sub…how bad the sixth grade choir was…and that’s with my assistant teacher being there…I have to tell you teaching for me right now is getting on my last nerve. This week my state of mind with the whole thing is if I could escape I would. That’s not exactly a great frame of mind to be in. I allowed the 7/8th grade honor choir to create motions to a song…they created them…but then have since complained to me about them…I’ve had student leaders complain to me that I’m not working with them enough on dynamics…and certain parts of the song…all things that I have gone over and go over regularly…but how many times are they actually listening…I just want to bang my head against a wall. (Remember I teach middle schoolers…)I guess it’s probably constructive criticism…I  guess I should say…oh good…thank you for sharing…but I’ve had a hard time pulling that out of myself…when what I really want to do is blast…You know why I love working in my yard, working with the dirt and mulch…I’m never disrespected by the mulch, it never talks back to me…it goes where I put it, it does it’s job…it actually listens to me…yes at times I talk out loud. Last night I was talking with a teenager and she inadvertantly said when I was talking to her about her future…I don’t know what I want to do but I sure don’t want to get “stuck” teaching…she’s blond…she didn’t realize it until it slipped out of her mouth that I’m a teacher and she just said that in front of me…But truthfully…teaching is an unbelievable job at times…and that whole “stuck” feeling…well I often feel it. I have to remind myself daily that I’ve surrendered my life to God, and that I told Him he could put me anywhere and I would do anything for him…can I tell you truthfully sometimes I think it would be easier to be a missionary in a foreign country than teach…I know my perspective is probably out of whack…I admit it. But that whole “Survivor” tv show…I say throw them into my job…see how they survive. Do you ever feel that way?

O.k. so this blog entry is not exactly uplifting…well one thing for sure…it’s real, it’s raw, it’s the naked truth…Tonight I’m calling out to God…letting Him know I can tell I don’t have the strength to make it through two more days…if I’m going to make it He’s going to have to take over. I must be getting older or something…but I’m worn out on every level. My girls told me I was being whiny…I mean I did have the day off and they didn’t…which is true…but I have to tell you…I think I need a lot more than a day off. Thankfully spring break is sneaking up in another week and a half…maybe that will help.  And once music contest is over on Saturday I get a break with the extra stuff on my plate until May…by then the finish line will be close enough that will help me get through it. Is this the way I’m supposed to feel…is this the perpsective I should have…I don’t think so…I sense I’m missing the joy…I understand the purpose…but sometimes I have to tell you I’m not sure that I’m making any difference anyway…I guess I just need some renewing in my life…God is able…He knows where I am…I love that worship song that says” Come just as you are to worship…” thank you God that I don’t have to be all together, all cleaned up, all perfected, all in the right mental state to come to you and worship. I also think of the hymn “Just as I am…” sometimes I think we just have to come to God just like we are…and just be upfront that things are not rosy, they are not joy filled, they are not what I would like them to be…God meets us there and truthfully…that’s the miracle of life that somehow He takes our “just as I am” state and makes it something beautiful…That’s what I need tonight…and a good night’s sleep:).

Love,

Ruth

Good Morning!

Seems so nice to be taking the day off…the kids are at school…I even read through the papers from the last three days…sometimes they stack up a bit:). Might lay down for a nap this morning…waiting on my dirt to arrive also…so we’ll see. Last night I mentioned that I was going to a Jazz concert, it was a saxophone player  named Boney James. I had never heard of him before but I guess he’s very famous. Either way he was wonderful, in fact his whole band was awesome. I don’t think I’ve ever heard such effortless playing, they looked like they enjoyed every minute playing together and I’m not sure how he did it…but it was as if while he was playing he didnt’ even have to breath. Wow! I played the saxophone in band growing up but I have to tell you it sounded nothing like what I heard last night. It was incredibly relaxing. I could see myself going to more concerts like it in the future…we’ll see.

So…no big plans for the day for me, probably a little house cleaning, laundry, etc. but otherwise just taking it slow (o.k. I never exactly take it slow but you know what I mean). This Saturday I have music contest again so this is kind of like my saturday today.

Hope you have a wonderful day! The sun is out…it’s a great day to be alive.

Love,

Ruth

I’m tired today. Sometimes I wonder why I’m so worn out at the end of the school day but when I look back and glance at my schedule, the amount of kids I see in one day, I can see why. I probably saw close to 350 kids today, and I have this problem where I tend to expect respect, self control, and good behavior from each one…no small feat. Imagine parenting that many kids…I often feel that is what I’m doing, trying to raise that many kids in a day. No wonder I’m exhausted. Then I take a look at my schedule and that definitely clears up the reason why I’m exhausted, as I travel to my next school the kids for that class are already sitting in the room waiting on me…On Wed and Mon. I literally go to the Middle school for before school choir, drop Lydia off at her school, rush to my elementary school, teach back to back classes all morning in time to run back to the middle school for choir which is followed by lunch, Praise God, then I teach another choir class and run back over to my elementary where they are sitting in class waiting on me…so that I can then rush back over to the middle school where they are waiting on me to start my last class. So…if I have that semi ran over me feeling it seems like their are clear reasons…about 350 of them to be exact. Then I come home to my two darling children…

Anyway…Lydia has grown…she traded in her half size violen yesterday and has moved up to a 3/4 size. It occurred to me in my mind yesterday as we were trading it in that Mark never heard her play, he never saw her hold her tiny quarter size violen that she used when she first started. He never saw Lauren play in the band, play on his drum set and actually keep a good beat…just seems so strange to me that so much of life is happening without him knowing about it…or at least that’s how it feels. Maybe Lydia can play for him in heaven someday.

Tonight I’m going to a Jazz Concert while Lori  is watching my kids, it will be a late night…but I’m taking tomorrow off anyway which is wonderful!! I think Jazz is right about my speed right now…relaxed and comfortable…that’s about my state of mind at present.

Tomorrow Lydia has an orchestra concert which she didn’t tell me about until yesterday…seems a little short notice but you know how it goes. She gets to play with the middle school orchestra so that’s cool…and she’ll get to hear the high school orchestra which is always a good thing. Gives her something to shoot for. And tomorrow is dirt day at my house…such fun:).

Hope your day was great!

Ruth

Made it though another day:). It sure has been windy lately and the rain has just started coming in. Last night I ordered my dirt to finish off my backyard so that comes on Thursday…I am getting some help to spread it thankfully:). This evening my big plans are to go have a pedicure done…my feet are already in bad shape…could be that whole flipflop/mulch thing:). Sometimes if nothing else is spruced up on me…if my feet are than I feel good, I’m one of those odd birds who likes to find a new toe ring each spring and wear it until it falls off sometime late in the summer.

Tomorrow is a day that is important to me…ok all days are important but tomorrow I’m having an experience that means a lot to me. I would appreciate your prayers for the whole thing…no specific request…except that God would be present, that things would be seen clearly, that God’s peace would overflow and that the hope He has given me wouldn’t die. That all may sound a bit strange but if it comes to your mind than feel free to throw a prayer up to God for me. At some point someday…I’m sure I’ll write in greater details but not today.

This morning I read Psalm 139 to my kids when we pulled into the school parking lot on our way into school. I love that Psalm…the truth that He knew me before I was even born, He knows everyday, every thought, every word before I even say it. And I have often made the verse at the end my prayer…even as a teenager. “Search me O God, and know my heart, test me and know my anxious thoughts see if their be any wicked way in me and lead me in the way everlasting…” THat’s my prayer today.

HOpe you had a great day!

Love,

Ruth